Sex trafficking victim Cyntoia Brown, now 29, was only 16 when she was sentenced to 51 years in prison for the first-degree murder of her abuser.

In 2011, Dan Birman released the documentary Me Facing Life: Cyntoia's Story, which provided heartbreaking details about Brown's life both before and after she was trafficked.

Six years after the documentary aired, her story has caught the attention of celebrities and the general public — and many people are furious that a child was given such a lengthy prison sentence under these circumstances.

The #FreeCyntoiaBrown hashtag has quickly gone viral on Twitter and Instagram, with high-profile celebrities from Rihanna to Kim Kardashian West expressing their support for Brown. The majority of the posts include a photo of Brown during her trial, which is a powerful reminder that she truly was just a child when she was her sentence was handed down.

did we somehow change the definition of #JUSTICE along the way?? cause..... Something is horribly wrong when the system enables these rapists and the victim is thrown away for life! To each of you responsible for this child's sentence I hope to God you don't have children, because this could be your daughter being punished for punishing already! #FREECYNTOIABROWN #HowManyMore

A post shared by badgalriri (@badgalriri) on Nov 21, 2017 at 5:12am PST

The system has failed. It’s heart breaking to see a young girl sex trafficked then when she has the courage to fight back is jailed for life! We have to do better & do what’s right. I’ve called my attorneys yesterday to see what can be done to fix this. #FreeCyntoiaBrown pic.twitter.com/73y26mLp7u

— Kim Kardashian West (@KimKardashian) November 21, 2017

Free da GOAT🐐 #IGotSomethingOnTheApeal

A post shared by TIP (@troubleman31) on Nov 20, 2017 at 11:20pm PST

this is unfair #justiceforcyntoia https://t.co/j8kPRYXVQg

— Lana Del Rey (@kidsoflana) November 21, 2017

Meanwhile, a petition on MoveOn.org for Brown to receive a presidential pardon has gained major traction over the past 24 hours. Although it was launched in 2013, public interest in the case was revived when Fox 17 ran a new segment with an update on Brown's case, and it caught the attention of celebs like Rihanna and West. The petition currently has nearly 140,000 signatures and 75,000 of those came within the last 24 hours, a spokesperson told Refinery29 via email.

In the years since Brown was sentenced to 51 years in prison, state laws have changed. If she was arrested today, Brown would be recognised as a victim of human trafficking. During her time in prison, Brown has completed her associate's degree and is currently working on her B.A., according to Newsweek. She also works with the Juvenile Justice system.

You can sign the MoveOn.org petition here.

Original story was published on 1st June 2017.

Cyntoia Brown was 16 when she received a prison sentence of 51 years for first-degree murder. Under Tennessee law, children convicted of this crime are required to serve at least that many years before they can be eligible for parole. Dan Birman, who produced the documentary Me Facing Life: Cyntoia's Story, argues in an article for The Conversation that punishments like these are too harsh.

Brown was a sex trafficking victim who was being sexually abused by the man she was living with. After he ordered her to go get money, she left, and a man named Johnny Allen took her home with him. She claimed she found guns in his house and was afraid he would kill her, so she shot him first, according to The Associated Press. (Prosecutors argued that she shot him to steal from him.)

After spending time with Brown, Birman believes her side of the story. Her family had a history of sexual abuse, and she was "a young runaway caught up in a bad situation," he wrote. He also believes that her case illustrates a larger problem: Due to Tennessee's laws, children convicted of first-degree murder there have virtually no shot at getting out of prison. The average life span of a prisoner is 50 years, he points out, and she'd be 67 before she could be eligible for parole. As of June 2016, 183 people serving life sentences in Tennessee had been sentenced as teens, according to The Tennessean.

Since kids' brains aren't totally developed, many consider it unfair for people's actions as children to determine the rest of their lives. This is one reason why the Supreme Court has ruled that children can't get the death penalty and states can't make life sentences without parole for juveniles mandatory. It's also why many states require reevaluations of children's life sentences after a certain time period.

With a chance at getting out, Birman believes people sentenced as teens could turn their lives around. Brown herself has gotten an associate's degree, is a mentor to other girls in her prison, and "has been called a model prisoner," according to The Tennessean.

"In my opinion, Cyntoia Brown is not the same girl who was arrested in 2004," Birman wrote. "We learned that some children – not all – do change. But even though there are systems in place to effectively rehabilitate a juvenile in the prison system, there is no hope under current Tennessee law unless this changes."

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Boobs. Bosoms. Melons. Whatever you choose to call them, breasts and their many guises are a huge part of being a woman. Part erogenous zone, part sustenance-givers, part whatever-you-choose-to-make-them, breasts have come to represent the complexities of womanhood, from maternal softness to bold sexuality.

Naturally, the size of your boobs doesn’t make you any more or less of a woman, and whether they’re big, small or whatever, you should love and cherish them unconditionally. After all, much like the rest of the female anatomy, boobs come in all shapes, sizes and hues – and they’re all perfect. Breasts are, realistically, little more than glorified bags of fat (as Rachel Bloom so eloquently puts it), but they’re a magical thing nonetheless and, contrary to what a certain viral headline might have led you to believe, they never left.

Scientifically speaking, if you are one of the many women blessed with an abundant chest, chances are you're also blessed with a variety of evolutionary benefits. Research suggests that women with larger breasts can have higher IQs, while another study links bigger breast size to higher fertility ratio. It's also believed that the adipose tissue in breasts not only creates body heat and keeps you warmer during cold months, but it could even help you float, essentially turning your girls into a built-in life vest should you ever find yourself upstream without a paddle. Big boobs also mean you give amazing hugs, but that's less to do with science and more to do with the fact that big boobs are essentially giant pillows. They're one hell of a versatile body part.

All I ever wanted in life was big boobs. I come from a long line of wide-hipped and ample-bosomed women but sadly, I take after my father's side. Growing up I would tell myself that my boobs would eventually come in and, despite having a respectable 36C, I still long for the day where I’ll be able to effortlessly fill a plunging neckline without the aid of a push-up.

So since I can’t experience the excellence of big boobs myself, I have to live vicariously through other big-chested women, with a mix of envy and fascination. I'm currently listening to Freya Lingerie's brilliant podcast When Life Give You Melons, in which Maya Jama is joined by a whole host of well-known women to discuss the ups and downs of having big boobs, dating and many other of life's daily dilemmas. We also asked four women to tell Refinery29 a little bit more about what life is like with big, beautiful breasts...

Rosie, 29, wears a 30HH

“As I have gotten older I have become more comfortable with my body shape and learned how to dress to flatter my shape, without having to wear very big, sacky things all the time! I wore a very fishtail dress at my wedding and felt like Jessica Rabbit.”

Jillian, 26, wears a 32F

“When I was younger I really wished I had a smaller chest. I felt like I stood out (literally) and got a lot of unwanted attention and comments about my boobs. Not just from boys but even from other girlfriends – it was just making comments about my body that I didn't want! I seriously considered breast reduction surgery when I was younger but as I got a bit older, grew more comfortable in myself, learned what clothes worked for me and how to ignore others, I gradually became more accepting and stopped caring that much. The best thing about having big boobs is that they are really fun to play with and they look great in lots of outfits (especially ones that many other people can't pull off). They're such a part of my body now I can't imagine not having them, and I'm totally happy with that.”

Rochelle, 31, wears a 38JJ

“I have always had big boobs, even at school I was a DD. When I have been out for dinner and had to walk past tables/chairs with a small gap, my boobs have fully knocked someone in the head. The best thing is that they can fill out dresses and tops nicely. Also, the fact that they provide cushion when laying on your front.”

Kirsten, 35, wears a 32F

“I have a lingerie addiction (I’m an ex-bra fitter) and having big boobs allows me to justify spending so much more on bras. They also give a little extra warmth, strapless tops stay up without bras, effortless cleavage, confidence/attention (although there’s also the flip side).”

Want to hear more about boobs, work, life, and careers? Listen to Freya Lingerie's podcast When Life Gives You Melons

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A post shared by Mimi (@miminisanat) on Nov 9, 2017 at 7:39pm PST

If you're thinking about going vegan or just upping your fruit and veg intake in the new year ( and you happen to live in London), you're in for a huge treat. One of New York's coolest vegan cafés is launching in the heart of the capital in January and, after a cursory Instagram scroll, we're already salivating.

By Chloe, which also boasts branches in LA and Boston, will open its first international location in Covent Garden in 2018 and hopes to expand further across the capital. It will have about 70 seats and offer the option to both eat in and grab and go.

The plant-based, fast casual restaurant chain is a favourite among Instagram's coolest kids and has been described variously as "chic", "intensely hip" and "the best vegan restaurant in town, maybe the world" by one restaurant site.

Forgot how much I love the (#glutenfree #vegan) cupcakes from @eatbychloe until I had one. And then another 😜🍬 #bychloe #silverlake #losangeles

A post shared by Nicole Cogan (@nobread) on Nov 11, 2017 at 8:40am PST

Popular By Chloe dishes include a guacamole burger, quinoa taco salad, matcha kelp noodles and mac 'n' cheese made with sweet potato cashew cheese sauce, shiitake bacon and almond parmesan, and there will be a range of new dishes exclusive to the UK. In the States, it also serves such drool-worthy brunch options as scrambled tofu, quinoa hash browns and smoothie bowls.

It will also satisfy the sweet-toothed among us, serving plant-based treats including pastries, cookies, cupcakes and all-natural ice cream (think salted peanut butter, kale cookies and cream, matcha... the list goes on). Have a glance at some of the full US menus online for a clearer picture, although we wouldn't recommend doing it on an empty stomach.

You can also grab fresh juices, the usual tea and coffee, and – if the US menus are anything to go by – all-natural vegan pet treats, including doggie bones and "pupcakes". Because why should they be left out of the plant-based club? Veganism has exploded in the UK over the last decade, rising by 360%, and is now considered "cool", thanks to Instagram and the likes of JME and restaurants like Cook Daily.

byCHLOE did not disappoint! This was the green smoothie bowl and hot cakes🤘🏼 #brunch #bychloenyc

A post shared by 📍Baltimore/JHU (@foodie2shoes_) on Jul 15, 2017 at 11:28am PDT

Samantha Wasser, one of By Chloe's cofounders, said London was "a perfect fit" for the chain. “The thriving dining scene, the culture and the fashion all make London the ideal city filled with diners with a growing curiosity for vegan and plant-based cuisine," she told the Independent.

The first branch of the meat- and dairy-free joint was opened in 2015 by 30-year-old(!) vegan chef Chloe Coscarelli, who was a contestant on the US reality show Cupcake Wars, has written various plant-based cookbooks and was included in Forbes' 30 Under 30 list for 2017. Intimidating much? At least we'll be able to grab a slice of something similarly virtuous in the capital soon enough. See you in the queue.

Follow By Chloe's expertly curated Instagram and check out the café in the new year at Drury House, 34-43 Russell Street, London WC2B 5HA

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Emma Stone is navigating a steep learning curve — but she's more than up for the challenge.

The Battle of the Sexes star revealed in an interview with Refinery29 that she's still trying to confront fears about speaking out on issues of inequality, and that working on the biopic about sports legend Billie Jean King has been altogether eye-opening. The new movie focuses on the iconic 1973 match of the same name, which pitted the young tennis champion against a much older, male opponent named Bobby Riggs.

We spoke with the actress in New York this week about why you don't have to be perfect to be brave and the sexism we're still fighting today, nearly half a century after King's match point.

Refinery29: How did you prepare to play the legendary Billie Jean King?

Emma Stone: "It was so eye-opening. I was researching so much about her when she was around age 29: Seeing how brave and daring she had to be, to speak out when it was not as open a forum as it is now, to do something like starting the Women’s Tennis Association with $1 when she was number one in the world... It took this insane amount of bravery. We stand on shoulders like hers, and it’s up to all of us to keep those messages alive."

The sexism in Battle of the Sexes really runs the gamut, from the kind you can laugh at to the kind that makes your skin crawl. Can you talk to me about what it was like, bringing those moments to screen?

"There’s something disheartening about how relevant this movie is now. The way that some of the male characters speak: It’s rhetoric we’ve heard recently, not just in one on one exchanges but also from our branches of government. Going into scenes with Bill Pullman [who plays tennis pro and commentator Jack Kramer] were really interesting. There’s this moment when he says, ‘I love women,’ and Billie Jean says, ‘I know you love women in the kitchen and in the bedroom; it’s when they ask for a little bit more of what you’ve got that you can’t stand.’ That sentiment can be true to this day, in many different dynamics."

One of the challenges of making movies about women, and about struggles that are still considered ‘women’s issues’, is getting men to engage with those narratives. What do you think is the key to them to pay more attention?

"Everyone’s issues are the issues of everyone. I think that’s one of the great lessons of Billie Jean and what her feminism is: a true equality. She loves men. She loves women. It’s about equal respect and equal treatment. When we can look at another who is not like us and realise that we are more alike than different, then it becomes fascinating to learn their story and expand our own minds. That can be scary, depending on where you came from or how you were raised, or what your religion might say about equality between all — that some things are right and some things are wrong. But fundamentally, we are all human, trying to to the best we can."

“Billie Jean has a story she tells about how women will come up to her and say the Battle of the Sexes — the original event, in 1973 — meant so much to them, it changed their life, they they asked for a raise. She always says, ‘did you get it?’ and they say either they got it or they didn’t but they had the courage to ask. But she says that usually when men come up to her, they’re crying. They say: I didn’t realise what this fight was. They have a mother, a daughter, a woman they love in their life who they want to feel empowered in the way that Billie Jean so beautifully displayed. You have to listen in order to understand. We all want to be loved. We all want to be respected for what we offer. Each of us has a piece of the conversation to add."

Where do you see your role in that conversation?

“In terms of finding my own voice — which I’m still very much in the middle of — I’m still learning how to use it, because I’ve been afraid of it for a long time. I have made mistakes, and I have thought, ‘How dare I try to say something if I don’t understand every element of everything all the time?’ One of the great lessons that Billie Jean taught me is that you don’t have to be perfect to be brave. You can still be figuring things out; you can still be juggling. You can still be afraid every single day. She listens, and cares so deeply, and wants to hear people’s stories and wants to grow constantly, and I think that energy is so inspiring. I know that’s an idealistic way to think, maybe a little utopian. But I definitely feel galvanised by Billie Jean, to try, to just listen, more and more."

You’ve been working in the industry for more than a decade. A lot has changed during that time. What are front lines of women in Hollywood now?

“I think times are changing. People are more outspoken — including, hopefully, people like me, who have made mistakes in the past. I don’t need to get into too many details right now in this moment. But I certainly have made choices that I would make very differently now, which I want to discuss in a deeper way at a different time. It’s up to all of us to keep our ears open, keep our minds open, to make mistakes, learn from them, change. There’s so much ground still to be broken in terms of equality for all genders, all races, all sexualities."

“There are a lot of people using their voices to affect change in my industry, the same way that Billie Jean was using her voice to affect change in hers. I think now people are using their voices to point out inequality, or call out inconsistencies between what someone says and an action being taken. The fact that about 30% of roles onscreen are female roles, and only a quarter of those roles are for women over the age of 40, whereas we have male movie stars who really hit their stride over the age of 40? Obviously, there’s so much more inclusion that needs to be happening.”

Battle of the Sexes is in UK cinemas on 24th November.

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Religious communities haven't always had the best relationships with LGBTQ+ people. But thankfully, that's been changing, thanks to accepting faith leaders and brave LGBTQ+ individuals who manage to stay in touch with their faiths despite unfriendly religious environments.

One of these individuals is J Mase III, a black trans masculine person, educator, and poet with deep roots in both Christianity and Islam. His trans identity and his religious identity may overlap in his work and life now, but reconciling the two took time, patience, and a willingness to engage with the religious texts he grew up with in wholly new ways.

In a recent conversation with Refinery29, Mase discussed how transgender communities of faith can exist within organised religions, the problems that remain for people who are trans and religious, and why reclaiming your body as a trans person is a spiritual act.

Ahead, read our conversation with Mase and learn more about his personal experiences as a trans person of faith.

Interview has been edited for length and clarity.

What is your religious background? What did religion mean to you growing up?
"I was raised in a Christian and Muslim household, with my mother’s side of the family being Baptist and my father being from the Nation of Islam. As a young person, I always learned about faith from my father’s side in a very open-ended way: You’re always in communication with Allah. My mother’s side was more dominant in that we went to church every Sunday. You go to church, someone from the pulpit tells you what to believe, and you internalise that. So by the time I was 11, no one told me being trans or gay was wrong directly, but I was coming home every day and trying to pray transness, gayness, and queerness out of me.

"I started coming out in my early to mid-teens. I have had multiple experiences of people trying to exorcise demons from my body because I was a trans and queer person. But, before that, I had a conversation with my mother who, because of the ways her faith manifested, was not able to accept me as a queer person or as a trans person. I actually came out to my father and his family members a number of times, just because I wasn’t sure that they heard and understood what I was saying, because it was just so easy."

How did your relationship with faith change as you accepted your queer and trans identity?
"I actually walked away from faith for a long time. What made me come back to faith was working for a queer youth centre. Our department did a lot of trainings and workshops with different faith communities. My boss at the time had a lot of trauma around faith stuff and wasn’t really keen on going to all these places, and I was like, 'I love church! I love mosque! I love all these things!' When I started doing that kind of work, I discovered the difference between 'defensive' and 'liberation' theologies. Especially when we talk about the Abrahamic faiths (Christianity, Islam, and Judaism), defensive theology looks like six or seven scriptures that are consistently used to claim that LGBTQ+ folks are unholy or sinful, like the story of Sodom and Gomorrah. People use these scriptures to say, 'This text says that God killed these people because they were gay.' If I argue and say, 'Well actually, if you look at Ezekiel, it says that the sins in Sodom and Gomorrah were about greed and not about sexuality,' I prove that this scripture has nothing to do with LGBTQ+ folks. It is at best neutral — and that’s not liberation.

"Around 25, I learned liberation theology, which says if this text is about all of God’s people, and God created us all, then we must also be in the text. It forced me to look at different stories. One of my favourite stories, which is both in the Quran and the Bible, is the story of Yusuf in the Quran and the story of Joseph in Genesis in the Bible. It tells the story of this character who is very prophetic with their dreams, but who also can be interpreted as someone who is very gender non-conforming and possibly a non-binary trans person. This person ends up saving all these people, including their family, from starving. When I looked at stories like that, that reengaged my desire to read the Quran and the Bible. It made me think more critically — what does it mean that other people have been teaching me not to like these books? We were just using passed-down theology. That brought me back into wanting to do theology work on my own. It brought me into wanting to pray more. It brought me into not just feeling like I could be a spiritual or faith-based person, but I was regardless. It made me reclaim some of the stuff that I felt was stolen from me."

What role does faith play in your life and work now?
"By trade, I’m a poet and I do lots of educational consulting as well. But my heart is very much in faith spaces. I’ve been working with a friend of mine, Lady Dane Figueroa Edidi, putting together a book called The #BlackTransPrayerBook, which is a reclamation of a black trans theology. It’s going to be an interfaith book. As black trans people, we are often forced out of faith spaces that will pray to white Jesus but won't consider why is it that Christianity was such a tool for colonisation or how it’s been used to harm us.

"This work is about creating and examining a theology that tackles anti-blackness, black affirmation, transphobia, transmisogyny, as well as trans liberation. Those are the things that I’m interested in and that comes through in my poetic work, too."

How can it not be a spiritual act to reclaim myself, my body, my name, and my pronouns?

Christianity can have a white, heteronormative reputation. Have you ever had to defend your commitment to Christianity as a black trans masculine person?
"In Christian and Muslim spaces, there is this idea of trans people being unholy because we seek to change that which God made us. What I love to put out to people is that we are consistently told in our places of faith why we are more than just physical bodies — and no one more embodies that than trans people. How can it not be a spiritual act to reclaim myself, my body, my name, and my pronouns?"

There’s something really powerful about using spirituality to reclaim one’s body.
"It’s anti-faith to think that we as humans can look at just the physical world and think we know everything about how we’re called to be. Gender and a lot of things need to be liberated from the ways we examine ourselves."

What advice do you have for young people of faith who are questioning and exploring their gender identity?
"For the young Muslim folks, especially trans Muslim folks, you are not the only. You are not the first. There is a whole community of us out here. Please search for and reach out to that community. We are going into queer spaces, which are largely run by white people or white money, that oftentimes robs us of our culture. There’s so much language beyond English, beyond academic understandings of transness and queerness, in which our people have always existed as trans bodies.

"For people of all different faiths who are younger than me, know that just because someone tells you something about what your faith is supposed to look like doesn’t mean you have to believe them. As much hatred as there is out in the world, they cannot destroy us or stop us from existing. Know that there is something holy about us that keeps us here."

What else needs to be understood about the trans experience within faith communities?
"Some of the worst transphobia I’ve ever experienced is in LGBTQ+ affirming churches that didn’t know crap about trans people — spaces that will add a little 'T' on their door and think, 'I got your pronouns right once, so you should like me.'

"If I went to someone who was anti-trans and said, 'Why do you think that I’m so sinful?' they could probably pull out four or five scriptures to spit at me. I could go to an LGBTQ+ affirming church in many places right now and say, 'Give me a scripture that affirms me as a trans person,' and the only thing they’ll come up with is 'God is love.' That’s a wonderful sentiment, but it is not as nuanced as what the people who hate me have. We as trans people deserve better than that. We deserve theology. We deserve faith communities that understand us intimately, not just in the physical self. Trans-led faith spaces need to come up more in the world and be given resources to function. Because we need something very different than what’s being offered."

You can support The #BlackTransPrayer Book here.

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As of today, some 750 million girls and women around the world were married before the age of 18, according to the United Nations International Children's Emergency Fund (UNICEF). Child marriage is considered a human rights violation, since it's a major obstacle to sustainable development across the world. The highest rates of child marriage is found in sub-Saharan Africa.

The practice disproportionately impacts girls, though boys are also affected at a lesser degree. According to experts, the practice worsens the cycle of poverty for child brides, blocks them from obtaining an education, and exposes them to many health-related risks as girls who are forced to have children at an early age are more likely to die or face severe complications during childbirth. They're also more vulnerable to sexual violence and domestic abuse than those who are not forced to wed at a young age.

Over the last 15 years, Pulitzer prize winning photojournalist Stephanie Sinclair has made it her mission to document the experiences of young girls forced into marriages in order to give them a voice. She also founded the non-profit organisation Too Young To Wed, which aims to protect girls' rights and end child marriage. As part of the organisation's grassroots efforts, they help provide child brides with new opportunities, including offering scholarships so they can pursue an education and helping them attend female empowerment photography workshops.

"I've been most moved by the resilience of these girls. I've met hundreds at this point. They just say — every single one of them, almost without fail, no matter what they've been through — they just say: 'I want to go back to school'," Sinclair told Refinery29. "That's why we're doing what we're doing. We need to empower individual girls, because as it happens, they will have an impact in their communities and that's how change will happen."

Too Young to Wed's Tehani Photo Workshop was named after Tehani, an eight-year-old child bride in Yemen who was unable to escape her marriage. This year, with Canon's support, 18 teen girls who escaped their marriages were brought together for the workshop in Kenya. Through assistance from the Samburu Girls Foundation and Too Young to Wed, the girls are now pursuing their education.

Ahead, a selection of photographs the girls took of each other during Too Young to Wed's workshop. It provides an intimate look at their feelings on being married as children.

Too Young To Wed is holding a print sale until Tuesday November 28th to benefit communities impacted by child marriage. All proceeds will go to grassroots efforts and workshops. You can check the sale out here.

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A massive scientific study has lent support to a theory you may have suspected long ago: different types of alcohol really can impact our mood in different ways. And if the idea had never before crossed your mind? Well, maybe that angry outburst outside Wetherspoons in 2009, or all that crying in the club, will now make sense.

The study of nearly 30,000 people aged 18-34 from 21 different countries, published in the journal BMJ Open, links spirits to feeling angry, sexy or tearful; while red wine and beer were more closely linked to feeling relaxed.

All respondents drank beer, wine and spirits and were asked to list the feelings associated with them when at home or when out. There were a range of positive and negative emotions to choose from: energised, relaxed, sexy, confident, tired, aggressive, ill, restless and tearful.

Red wine was found to make people feel more lethargic than white wine and, like beer, was strongly linked to feeling relaxed. Spirits were linked to sexiness, with 40% saying spirits made them feel sexy, and over half saying spirits gave them energy and confidence (hello, pre-night-out G&Ts!).

On the less positive side, a third of people also said they felt aggressive when drinking spirits and spirits were more likely to be linked to illness, restlessness and tearfulness, so it's probably worth working out which side of the spectrum you land.

In general, men were more likely to associate aggression with all types of alcohol and younger people (ages 18-24) had the strongest associations between all alcohol and confidence, energy and sexiness when drinking away from home (which may explain the carnage of university freshers' week).

Depending on your past (bad) experiences, these findings may not be news and they unfortunately don't explain why particular kinds of alcohol are linked to different emotions. Or they may explain a whole lot in your life and make you rethink your tipple of choice – could it be worth swapping a first-date G&T for a glass of red to calm the nerves and reduce the chance of an angry tirade, for instance?

The results could also have some important implications for dealing with problem drinking in society. “Understanding emotions associated with alcohol consumption is imperative to addressing alcohol misuse, providing insight into what emotions influence drink choice between different groups in the population,” they researchers concluded.

Professor Mark Bellis, one of the co-authors, said: “For centuries, the history of rum, gin, vodka and other spirits has been laced with violence. This global study suggests even today consuming spirits is more likely to result in feelings of aggression than other drinks," reported HuffPost UK.

“In the UK, a litre of off-licence spirits can easily be bought for £15 or less, making a double shot only 75p. Such prices can encourage consumption at levels harmful to the health of the drinker and through violence and injuries also represent a risk to the people around them.”

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Switching career tracks to do something you're passionate about is never easy, but for Alyssa Rosenheck, the impetus came in the form of a cancer diagnosis.

The 35-year-old was a high-earning medical advisor when she was diagnosed with thyroid cancer in 2014. Within two weeks, she quit her job, bought a camera, and began actualising her dream of becoming an interior photographer as she underwent surgery and healing. She now travels once a week for her assignments, and runs the blog The New Southern.

Here, Rosenheck shares how the diagnosis has prompted her to switch career tracks and travel more — and how her life has become fuller because of it.

I have always been a really hard-worker. Growing up in Tulsa, Oklahoma, I was an elite gymnast and played tennis throughout high school, and was offered a tennis scholarship in college. My dream was always to either go into the corporate world or become a doctor. I had imagined this really structured life path for myself, with financial independence at the forefront of my mind.

After graduation, I worked for two Fortune 500 companies in quick succession: My first job was with 3M's industrial manufacturing division, and I was working in a multi-million dollar sector of the company. Eventually, I shifted into the medical device consulting field. My area of specialty was surgical equipment for the spine: It was one of the highest-earning fields, but my schedule was gruelling. I would be on 10 to 15-hour shifts at the hospital, talking to surgeons on the best types of device to use in the operating room.

In my six years working at this job, I didn't take any time off for vacation.

It was a highly demanding position in a heavily male-dominated field. In my six years working at this job, I didn't take time off for vacation — not even once. My only chance of ever doing some travel was when I attended medical industry conferences twice a year. In every sense of the word, my life leading up the the diagnosis was highly regimented and financially successful. My creative pursuits were an afterthought.

I didn't have any symptoms leading up to my cancer diagnosis. I wasn't feeling sick or anything — and all of a sudden, my life had changed. When you hear that you have cancer, everything in the world just stops, and you recalibrate and try to figure out your priorities.

I felt numb and was almost in denial. Those were some of the foggiest memories I had: I just wanted to survive and focus on something positive. After having an internal dialogue with myself, I realised that that I wasn't living my most authentic life. There was this whole creative side of myself I wasn't pursuing.

I was chasing these arbitrary levels of success through financial and corporate markers, but I've never done anything for my own passion and enjoyment.

I've always gravitated towards photography and had en eye for composition, but I've never done anything professionally before. Within two weeks of getting my diagnoses, I dropped everything: I resigned from my job, bought myself a camera, and taught myself how to shoot by reading the manual. Interiors and architecture were the focus — and distraction — I needed.

Doing this was my way of coping with everything that came with having cancer: Finding this creative outlet for myself was the cathartic experience that helped me through the surgery and recovery process. If anything, it allowed me to recognise how little control we have: Life happens regardless of the things things you're trying to achieve or the big life events you have going on. I was chasing these arbitrary levels of success through financial and corporate markers, but I've never done anything for my own passion and enjoyment.

I now travel once a week to shoot interiors around the country for magazines and private clients, and I get to style everything I shoot. Being able to travel weekly has this revitalising magic that leaves me constantly inspired. When I'm on location shooting, there's a true joy that washes over me — I feel like I'm in the zone and finally expressing myself artistically. Being able to travel for work — and do things like shooting on a mountaintop in Utah — brings me to tears, because I never imagined myself behind the lens.

April will mark four years since I am cancer-free. I'm very lucky to have been diagnosed early and had a successful surgery. Or else, the cancer would have eventually spread to my lungs. In a way, having cancer felt like a permission to do want I really want with full-force. I'm not sure if I would have had the courage to switch to a new career track had I not found out about my health: When your survival is at question, things like a career change won't even phase you.

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My little sister was only a year old the first time I told her that I'm gay and, clearly, she had no idea what I was saying. It was the summer after my freshman year of college, and the two of us were sitting in my mom's car waiting for her to run a quick errand. I turned around to face my sister, who was buckled into her car seat in the back, and said, “Katie? What would you do if I was gay? Would you still love me?”

She looked at me with her big, round, blue eyes and giggled. Then, the conversation was over.

With the exception of a drunken night in college when I told a friend that I “might be bisexual,” that was the first time I had ever come close to disclosing that I am not straight. And I chose to tell my baby sister because she was the only one I knew for sure wouldn’t judge me. She loved me simply because I was the person who turned on Rascal Flatts and danced her to sleep, and because I was the person who knew she would laugh uncontrollably if I brushed my hair against her face.

But when I tried to come out to her again seven years later, by then confident that I'm definitely a lesbian, and when she was definitely old enough to utter a response, I wasn’t sure what to expect. I knew she’d keep loving me, but I worried about what those seven years of watching princes fall in love with princesses, and hearing teachers talk only about mommies and daddies had taught her about gay people. Did she even know what “gay” meant? Would she think it was weird?

"Kassie, I love you 5,000 million feet through the universe." 💜

A post shared by Kassie Brabaw (@kassie_brabaw) on May 23, 2017 at 11:23am PDT

It’s possible she wouldn’t have known what it meant to be gay, or that it applied to me, even though I came out to the rest of my family only a few months after that long-ago talk in the car, had been out and proud in college, and once brought a girlfriend home to stay with us for two weeks. Katie was only three years old when my ex (coincidentally also named Katie) came to visit. For all she knew, the other Katie was my really good friend. And even though neither I nor my family purposefully hid the fact that I’m gay from my sister, no one had sat her down to explain what that meant, either. So, I knew it was my job to make sure she understood that women can and do love other women romantically — and that it's just as normal as when they love men.

I chose a random day the week before my brother’s wedding to talk to her, because bringing it up in terms of marriage seemed like the easiest way to explain. She was sitting at the kitchen table in her Dora the Explorer nightgown as I flipped eggs on the stovetop behind her.

“Hey Katie,” I said after we went over how excited she was to be a flower girl. “You know, if I get married someday it’ll be to a girl.”

Her eyes grew three sizes and I knew right then that my second worry — that she wouldn’t know two women could even get married — was justified. After all, I didn’t learn that gay people existed until I was 10 and listening to my grandfather shout “fucking dykes” out the window at two women on the street. So, even though she has a gay sister and is growing up in an arguably more progressive time, how could I expect her to understand queerness at 8 years old?

But the fact that she hadn’t yet formed an opinion about gay people actually worked to my advantage. Instead of having the kind of memory I have with my grandfather, I could make sure her first recollection of queerness was a positive one. (I’m pretty sure she doesn’t remember laughing about it that time in mom’s Toyota Camry.)

Our conversation was simple and straightforward; the typical “some women love women, and some men love men, and that’s okay” type of explanation that is often used to introduce kids to same-gender romances. At the end of our talk, clearly exasperated with all of this serious conversation, Katie said, “You know what I love? Toaster Strudel.”

So that was that, I thought as I took the eggs off the stove and popped in a Toaster Strudel. We had our big gay talk, and my duty was done.

But as Kristin Russo, co-founder of LGBTQ+ advice site Everyone Is Gay and co-author of This Is A Book For Parents Of Gay Kids, tells me, “Coming out is always a process, whether you’re coming out to a parent or a kid. It’s never done. She’s little, and there will be more pieces of it.”

She’s absolutely right, because just a few months later, I was once again sitting in the front seat of my mom’s car when she told me that Katie had been proudly telling the kids at school she has a gay sister — and that some of the kids were making fun of her for it.

I glanced at her in the back seat, as she blasted Moana through her headphones and was oblivious to our talk up front, and I couldn’t help but think that I had set her up to be bullied. Maybe I should have told her that not everyone thinks being gay is something to be proud about. Maybe I should have prepared her for the possibility that she could lose friends — not even over her own sexuality, but over mine.

I interrogated myself about the choice. Why did I choose that moment to come out to her? Why didn’t I explain homophobia? Why didn’t it cross my mind that she might face the same kind of hate I’ve become so accustomed to?

Talking to both Russo and Lindsay Amer, who runs a LGBTQ+ education YouTube show for kids called Queer Kid Stuff, helped to calm my guilt and put the blame where it really belongs — on parents who, consciously or not, teach their kids that being gay is wrong.

“I don’t want to have to talk about ‘-isms’ when talking to kids. I want to create a positive space for them to learn about different identities,” Amer tells me. But after the Pulse nightclub shooting happened, she says she had to make a video explaining homophobia, because the world isn’t always positive.

I felt the same way when coming out to my sister. I wanted to wrap her in a happy, gay bubble, where hatred and homophobia don't exist. But such a bubble isn’t possible, and Russo actually believes it can be a good thing for kids to confront complex topics like this.

“Is it great that at 8 years old you have to learn about this stuff — that maybe your friend won’t be very nice to you simply because you have a gay sister? No,” she says. “But, I don’t think that being 8 is too little to realise that other people think differently from you. And having these experiences makes for way more rounded, brilliant human beings.”

"I love being your sister." Me too, Katie. Me too. ♡

A post shared by Kassie Brabaw (@kassie_brabaw) on Jan 3, 2016 at 11:16am PST

As it turns out, my sister wasn’t even all that worried about the “friend” who made fun of her. She was sad, of course, but it didn’t cause the kind of devastation I was imagining.

A few weeks after my mom told me about the bullying, Katie and I were in the kitchen doing science experiments, which we always do when I visit. In between soaking gummy bears in vinegar and making a homemade lava lamp with Alka Seltzer and olive oil, I sat her down to have another serious talk. I wanted to make sure she knew that bullying wasn’t acceptable; that there was nothing wrong with our family, and to be sure she wasn’t afraid or upset going to school.

She told me that it was just one girl who had laughed when she talked about having a gay sister, and that she hadn’t been very nice to her ever since. But, she reasoned in little-kid logic, “It’s okay because she’s not in my class this year.”

Still, I knew that just because this girl was now in the classroom next door didn’t mean my sister would never again face homophobia. And next time, I wanted her to be prepared. So, I reminded her that being gay isn’t a bad thing — that it’s just about people who love each other. Then, I asked if she had any questions.

“Yeah,” she said, practically rolling her eyes, “When can we do the next science experiment?”

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In today's autumn budget the chancellor Philip Hammond announced, to cheers from MPs and much media fanfare, that the government would be abolishing stamp duty for most first-time buyers in England and Wales, a policy that would come into effect immediately.

The change will apply to homes worth up to £300,000 and anyone buying a property worth up to £500,000 will also not have to pay the tax on the first £300,000, effectively saving first-timers about £5,000. Hammond said it would help 95% of first-time buyers, particularly those in areas like London where property prices are out of control.

If, like most young people, you've never had to deal with the nitty-gritty of buying a property, stamp duty is a tax levied whenever you buy a property over a certain value in England, Wales and Northern Ireland. The amount varies across the UK and depending on whether or not you're a first-time buyer and whether it's a residential or mixed-use property. Previously, the starting point for paying it in England was £125,000, meaning the average first-time buyer in the UK would have to hand over about £1,660 on a property worth £208,000, the BBC reported.

The government also made another big housing announcement, pledging £44bn worth of investment for housing over the next five years, promising to build 300,000 new homes a year and making it easier for councils to build in areas that need housing most. This would be quite a feat, taking the housing supply to the highest level since the 1970s.

While the stamp duty cut will help many first-time buyers, it certainly won't benefit them across the board. Unlike another big new policy announcement from the budget – the millennial railcard for 26-30-year-olds, which we learned about yesterday – many believe it could harm the younger generation more than it helps them.

If you've got a £50k deposit and are buying a flat worth £300k, then the stamp duty cut will save you a vast £20ish a month on your mortgage. So that's the housing crisis over, then.

— Hugo Rifkind (@hugorifkind) November 22, 2017

Many pointed out that it mostly helps those already wealthy enough to think about buying a property and those with access to the Bank of Mum and Dad, rather than those on middle and low incomes trapped in the rental market and struggling to save for a deposit.

education can’t be free in case a rich person goes to university, and we can’t subsidise public transport in case a rich person takes a train. however, if you have tens of thousands of pounds spare for a deposit, here’s a £5k stamp duty tax cut

— Jon Stone (@joncstone) November 22, 2017

Stamp duty change: helps young people already wealthy enough to be thinking about house buying. And helps boost house prices which were in danger of falling. Great news, but not really for poor young people.

— Jonathan Haynes (@JonathanHaynes) November 22, 2017

Unaffordable house prices are the problem, not Stamp Duty. For most young people, the stamp duty cut will make little difference. But it will help the beneficiaries of the bank of mum and dad... #Budget2017

— Tom Kibasi (@TomKibasi) November 22, 2017

Even worse: many others pointed to a prediction from the Office for Budget Responsibility which said the change could cause house prices to rise by 0.3% next year, meaning that "the main gainers from the policy are people who already own property" – not so great for those not yet on the ladder.

IMPORTANT: OBR expects stamp duty cut for first-time buyers to INCREASE house prices...#budget2017 pic.twitter.com/wfGOhIT0z1

— Ben Chu (@BenChu_) November 22, 2017

Others suggested the policy was more about shoring up Tory support from younger people – among whom they've been haemorrhaging support recently – and gaining positive PR, rather than ensuring people across the UK can afford a roof over their heads. Nothing new there, then.

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Actress Saoirse Ronan, who stars in Greta Gerwig’s film Lady Bird, participated in The Hollywood Reporter ’s recent Actress Roundtable. During the lengthy discussion, THR writer Matthew Belloni, of course, brought up the topic of sexual harassment in Hollywood.When it came time for Ronan to share her thoughts on the subject, she made it clear that she stands with these women who are speaking out.

Ronan first acknowledged that no woman's story is more important than another's, saying, "I mean every story that's come out has so much gravity to it, has so much weight to it, and I think it would be wrong to sort of, like, you know, escalate one over the other." However, the actress also stated that, for her, there was one story in particular that highlighted just how brave these victims have had to be.

Ronan spoke specifically of Ambra Battilana Gutierrez, the Italian model who reported Harvey Weinstein to the authorities for groping her in 2015. After she reported him, she went back to Weinstein, this time wearing a wire, and allegedly got a recording of him admitting to the groping. Ronan was in disbelief over this story. She explained, "What was incredible about it was that she was brave enough to go back the next day because she knew that this was important for this to come. And, the fact that she put herself in that position again and made herself so vulnerable, and still nothing was done about it."

Though Ronan applauded all the women who have spoken out about experiencing sexual harassment and sexual abuse, she was also sure to let survivors who, for whatever reason, do not speak out know she is with them too. The actress said, "The women need to know that there's support for them no matter what. If they don't ever want to come out and say something, that's fine."

If you have experienced sexual violence of any kind, please visit Rape Crisis or call 0808 802 9999.

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Thanks to the likes of LGBT History Month and charities such as Stonewall, we now have a greater awareness of how far the LGBTQ+ community has come in its ongoing struggle for equality in the UK (and how far we all have to go). But many people still have gaping holes in their knowledge of queer culture and its impact.

This is where The Queer Bible comes in, a new website dedicated to the transformative lives of various queer heroes, or 'Queeroes'. Created by model and presenter Jack Guinness, the online guide asks big name writers to wax lyrical about their icons of choice and it promises to teach you a thing or two.

Award-winning writer, campaigner and Refinery29 contributor Paris Lees dedicates an essay to Laverne Cox, while Amelia Abraham explores the lives of Cookie Mueller, David Wojnarowicz and Stuart Feather, and Nathalie Olah discusses the life of Eileen Myles. Other celebrated Queeroes include Frida Kahlo, Prince and Vanessa Bell.

"LGBTQ+ people really have to seek out positive role models," Guinness told Refinery29. "They have to find a family and inspirations to help them explore who they are and construct their identity. We often don’t get the help of our peers or birth family. Too often young queer people have to do that alone. I wanted to make a space where learning about the queer community, especially the people that went before us, is easier."

While there are some great resources out there, such as Robert Aldrich’s book Gay Life Stories and Instagram accounts like The Aids Memorial, he wanted to bring together the perspectives of some of his own heroes to talk about their heroes.

Cookie Mueller by @constantin.prozorov Amelia Abraham writes about photographer Nan Goldin’s muse Cookie - today on www.queerbible.com #nangoldin #queer #queerbible #cookiemueller #queerhistorymatters #queerhistory

A post shared by Queer Bible (@queerbible) on Nov 22, 2017 at 6:48am PST

"Growing up in a straight world, so many people feel rejected and separate and pushed away. The Queer Bible is a way of connecting – to our current community and also the heroes that went before us: the artists, activists, writers, performers that have shaped culture and history. It’s a bloody amazing line-up. These guys are our people! I want young LGBTQ+ to take ownership of that," Guinness added.

He was inspired to create the platform by the singer Sam Smith. Guinness told i-d: "Remember at the Oscars when Sam thought he was the first gay person to win an Oscar and everyone went crazy at him for not knowing queer history? Sam got so much grief on Twitter... Whatever you think about what Sam said, it really challenged me, how well do I know my queer history?"

Pepper LaBeija by @constantin.prozorov George M Johnson writes about Pepper and the erasure of Black LGBTQ+ history today on www.queerbible.com #parisisburning #pepperlabeija #queerart #queer #queerhistory #queerhistorymatters

A post shared by Queer Bible (@queerbible) on Nov 22, 2017 at 6:50am PST

Already, Guinness has been floored by the positive feedback The Queer Bible has received. One man, in the process of coming out, wrote to him to say the project had been a real comfort, while a woman told him she wished there had been something like it when she was younger.

"For years, I felt that being gay was something wrong with me. It was the reason why I got bullied and I was made to feel ashamed of it. Now that very part of me makes me feel accepted and loved and connected to this amazing community. The very thing that caused pain as a young man is now the source of so much joy. It’s all quite overwhelming and I’m excited to see how the Queer Bible community grows."

Check out The Queer Bible's resplendent website and follow it on Instagram, Facebook and Twitter.

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Exploring family is intensely personal to a photographer. And yet, after her last family-focussed project La Casa Rosa, Italian photographer Bea de Giacomo has decided to tackle it again.

Linea Alba is named for the fibrous line that runs down our abdomen. The line that becomes more pronounced as the belly stretches during pregnancy. It ends up looking like a seam that's been drawn, right down the middle.

Linea Alba features de Giacomo's sister. The focus is on her heavily pregnant belly. "Through my research, especially through the portrait," she tells us, "I restore new connections between me and my family."

"During this intimate and private moment, the nature of my relationship with them evolves and finds new meanings."

The result is beautiful and ethereal. The pictures are real, unapologetic and decidedly powerful. "In Linea Alba," says de Giacomo, "I explored with her the relationship between her transformed body and the space, and at the same time I started to bond with her son."

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This Christmas, homeware gifts are going to be more in demand than ever as our obsession with living in an Instagram-ready environment grows.

Trouble is, people have different tastes. Which means there's a big possibility of getting your purchasing all wrong.

To help you out, we've selected our favourite gift-type things for all sorts of people, from the serial dinner party holder to the minimalist. If you're running low on present-buying funds, there's even a slide for you.

Click through for our homeware Christmas gift guide.

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As December approaches and the festive season gets into full swing, Netflix has us covered. The streaming giant has recently unveiled its full list of Christmas films and TV shows, including Love Actually, which joins the library on 14th December.

This month also brings the return of one of Netflix's biggest shows, The Crown. Season two picks up the action in 1956 and is expected to show Claire Foy's Queen Elizabeth dealing with Prince Philip's rumoured extramarital affairs. There are 10 new episodes to binge-watch from 8th December – perfect for those evenings when you've ducked out of a Christmas party early.

Other new movies joining the library this month include Maid in Manhattan with Jennifer Lopez, all three instalments of the Back to the Future trilogy, and Mad Max: Fury Road featuring Charlize Theron's fierce Imperator Furiosa.

Click through to see every single new title – and its release date – on Netflix this December.

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It's not easy for caffeine fiends to hear about the potential negative effects of coffee, so it's just as well that java seems to be increasingly gaining the blessing of scientists.

Researchers now claim we may be able to enjoy even more of the good stuff each day than we thought. According to a new analysis of 220 existing coffee studies, published in the BMJ, drinking up to four cups may have substantial health benefits.

The research, led by scientists from the University of Southampton, suggests that the overall benefits of drinking coffee outweigh the risks. Coffee drinkers were less at risk of liver disease, diabetes, dementia and some cancers and were less likely to die from stroke.

The strongest benefits were found in people who drank around three to four cups a day, who, according to one study, had a 17% reduced chance of death from all causes – but even those who drank up to seven cups still seemed to benefit from their caffeine habit, enjoying a 10% reduced chance. However, the benefits aren't universal, with women who are pregnant or who have a higher risk of suffering bone fractures advised against drinking too much coffee.

The study supports the NHS's caffeine recommendations, which say non-pregnant adults can have up to 400mg of caffeine per day. This equates to four mugs of instant coffee (at 100mg per mug), around three cups of filter coffee (at 140mg per cup) or just over five cups of tea (at 75mg per mug).

While the research doesn't definitively prove that coffee brings the aforementioned benefits, as it was based on observational data, the scientists said the findings back up other recent studies and reviews of coffee's impact on the body.

"Factors such as age, whether people smoked or not and how much exercise they took could all have had an effect," Professor Paul Roderick, co-author of the study, told the BBC, but his conclusion was very much pro-coffee. "There is a balance of risks in life, and the benefits of moderate consumption of coffee seem to outweigh the risks." As if we needed an excuse for a another coffee-shop run.

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While most women still take their husband's surname after they marry, various alternatives have become more popular in recent years. Husbands take their wives' surnames, some couples combine their surnames and, of course, women are increasingly shunning the practice altogether and keeping their own names.

While this subversion of the marital tradition is a positive choice for many women, it could affect how people perceive their husband. According to a new study, men whose wives don't take their surname are seen as disempowered and less masculine by their peers, while the women are considered high-status, powerful, ambitious and assertive.

Researchers from the University of Nevada carried out three studies, asking UK and US-based undergraduates to fill out an online survey in which they were asked to imagine a hypothetical scenario where a heterosexual woman kept her name after marrying. They then had to describe what they thought of the husband's personality.

In the first two studies, the husbands whose wives kept their own surnames were considered to be less powerful in the relationship and were described with "terms that are counter to the gender-typical personality traits and power framework used for men".

"A woman's marital surname choice therefore has implications for perceptions of her husband's instrumentality, expressivity, and the distribution of power in the relationship," said Rachael Robnett, the study's lead author. "Our findings indicate that people extrapolate from marital surname choices to make more general inferences about a couple's gender-typed personality traits."

This perception isn't universal, however, with people who cling on to traditional gender roles and "hostile sexists" having particularly strong opinions about men whose wives retain their surnames and negative reactions to women who violate gender norms.

Robnett said this was just the latest study to point towards a link between traditions in heterosexual romantic relationships and power structures benefiting men. "The marital surname tradition is more than just a tradition. It reflects subtle gender-role norms and ideologies that often remain unquestioned despite privileging men."

Nevertheless, taking a man's surname remains popular – even among young women. A YouGov poll last year found that most women (59%) would like to take their spouse's surname, with just 2% more men wanting them to do so. Surprisingly, given the push against outdated gender norms among younger women, they were just as likely as older women to want to give up their name for their husband's.

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Last Christmas, I posted a personal essay called "I May Never Find Love — & That Has To Be Okay " about how I’m slowly, but surely, getting over my fear of dying alone. I never thought I’d get the response that I did. Hundreds of you took to the comments, pouring your hearts out about your own vulnerabilities and fears. I had people blowing up my DMs on Instagram and Twitter, sliding into my Facebook messages, and sending me email after email.

I read every single comment. And then I ugly-cried in my pyjamas while pacing my apartment, gobsmacked by the beauty of it all. Then I read every single comment again. And that’s when I saw a theme appear: SO many of us feel alone because we’re the only single people in our friend group. It was something I saw commenters lament over and over again. There were dozens of women who claimed to feel alienated because their girlfriends were either in relationships or married.

It’s a feeling I know well. I have pretty much always been the token single girl among my friends. I entertain my coupled pals with tales of my Tinder dates, freely flirt with bartenders to get faster drinks for the group, and confidently show up to parties solo all the time. Most of the time, it’s great. But there are moments when it totally sucks: Like this past New Year’s eve, when I was at a party with all the twosomes and the clock struck midnight. Everyone around me started kissing, while I was left there awkwardly clutching my champagne until they unlocked lips. That stung a little.

The comments got me thinking: If there are so many single women out there with so many of the same fears and vulnerabilities, why aren’t we all getting drunk together and spilling our guts to one another? Why are we in a never-ending, vicious cycle of feeling alienated and alone because everyone around us is coupled up? Are we masochists, or just a little misguided?

I started thinking of my own experiences. The friend group I spend the majority of my time with lately is composed mainly of couples. In fact, up until a few months ago, I was the only single person in a sea of twosomes. It really happened by accident. I made a friend who soon found herself a boyfriend with whom I also got along, and through him I was introduced to the rest of the group. They all happened to be in relationships. Happens every day, right?

But then, an unwelcome thought bubbled up: I've chosen to be the only single person in my group because it’s safe. When I’m out with couples, I don’t actively seek out single men to talk to, and single dudes don’t actively hit on me. It’s like I’m being protected by a wall of twosomes. When I’m out with another single straight woman, I feel like it’s obvious that we’re on our own. It’s like I’m wearing a neon sign: "Currently looking for someone to give me orgasms three times a week and eat dim sum on my couch while watching Scientology documentaries. Please come up to me and offer me red wine."

I avoid single girls because they remind me of me, and I don’t necessarily like myself all the time when I’m single

My father has a theory that he’s picked up in his reading that I believe in very much: We avoid people who share similar unpleasant traits with ourselves, because it’s like looking in a mirror. I avoid single women because they remind me of me, and I don’t necessarily like myself all of the time when I’m single. Sitting next to a solo friend at a bar is like being in the scariest echo chamber of all time. We talk about how hopeless our situations are and we start to spiral. "I’m going to die alone!" we’ll cry. "If I don’t have a date to this wedding, I’m not going." Misery does love company, you know.

Surrounding myself with couples allows me to ignore these negative thoughts. It sometimes goes in the opposite direction, when the duos are overly positive about my dating life, which is frustrating. But it beats the hell out of realising that the guy you’ve been flirting with on Bumble has been feeding the same lines to your bestie on The League. (This is a real-life thing that happened to me.)

The worst truth, though — the truth I hate to admit to myself — is that I see other women as competition. I see them as a yardstick to measure myself against. The bartender offered to buy me my next round, not her. So I win. The investment banker types at the other end of the party are staring at her, not me. So what is wrong with me? It’s a screwed up way of thinking, but it’s a line of thinking I feel as if I've basically been trained to follow, based on society's expectations of women.

Now this might just be my experience. But seeing as so many commenters expressed the same feelings of alienation and fear, I’m willing to bet there are some of you reading this who know, deep down, that this is why you’re feeling alone in your singledom. And what I’ve realised is that these feelings have very little to do with other people, and everything to do with me and my own insecurities.

From now on, I’m attempting to change my view on other single women. I'm going to make an effort to reach out to the ladies in my life who aren't coupled-up, instead of pushing them away. You all aren’t my competition — you’re my glorious support system. You’re mirror images of strength and perseverance, not desperation and loneliness. And in you, I see dozens of people who I can turn to when I’m feeling super shitty about myself. As much as I love my coupled-up gals, there’s certain situations you’re better at helping in, simply because we’re in this together.

Don’t you feel better already?

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From the moment photographer Charlotte Hadden started her project Between, in which she photographs transgender children in the UK, she knew exactly how she wanted to approach the subject: on the children's own terms. "With all the misunderstanding surrounding young gender-questioning and trans people, I wanted to give them an opportunity to share their stories," Hadden tells Refinery29.

She sees transgender children as having to live double lives, "not only adjusting to growing and maturing as a person, but [also] battling to become the person they feel inside and to have the freedom to express that." With that in mind, Hadden aimed to give them a chance to be their whole selves in front of the camera.

By setting up in the children's homes and taking plenty of time to get to know them, Hadden makes her process as unobtrusive as possible — and makes sure that the children are part of it. She only takes a photo when it feels right, when the kids are totally comfortable with her.

Between doesn't make any grand, sweeping generalisations about the transgender experience. Instead, it highlights the regular, everyday lives of its subjects, from how they talk about their gender identity to how they spend time at home. "I want the viewer to look at the portraits and to just see them for the fun, awkward, amazing kids that they are," Hadden says.

Parents can get in direct contact with Hadden (whose project is ongoing) through Mermaids, a UK-based organisation that provides support for transgender children. She says that their interest in her work — and the kids' willingness to share — has overwhelmed her in the best possible way.

"I’ve been really moved by how open they have been with me," Hadden says. "The courage it takes to talk to a loved one about your gender, and how you might be questioning it, I just can't even imagine. [The children] are all incredibly smart and open."

Ahead, four of the kids Hadden has photographed talk with their parents about coming out.

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After I left my nursing career behind, my fascination with psychology and criminal behaviour led me to seek out a job within the prison service. It took a while to find something in my preferred area but finally, a job opened up.

I was so nervous about the interview that I very nearly drove on past the prison, deciding I couldn’t do it. However, I gave myself a stern talking-to and went in. There, I was faced with a group of much younger, more qualified and experienced people all waiting to go through the interview process, which didn't do much to calm my nerves but, to my amazement, I was successful and secured the position of psychological assistant.

And so, in 2010 I began my role in a male, category C prison which housed around 750 inmates, including a vulnerable prisoner unit (mainly for sex offenders), serving a variety of sentences. Their crimes ranged from drug-related offences to burglary, rape and murder. If I’m honest, I had little clue about what to expect – the only knowledge I had came from TV shows, and they certainly didn’t prepare me for what lay ahead.

Walking through the prison grounds on my first day was a nerve-racking experience. But I was with a colleague, and she had the keys to let us through the many large gates to get to the psychology department. After my induction week, however, I was handed a set of my own keys and no longer had someone to hold my hand. My first walk through the prison alone was a day I won’t forget in a hurry. It was unnerving. I timed it badly, getting to work just as the prisoners piled out of the living blocks to go to their activities – and found myself at a gate with about 20 men jostling around me, all keen to be let through. My hands shook as I asked each of them for their movement slips to check the reason for them moving through the grounds. They tutted, getting agitated with my slowness. I felt sick. But I managed and it didn’t take long before it became less scary.

My first ever contact with a prisoner will always be a standout memory for me. It was a man my age who’d been convicted of a young woman’s murder some years before. As part of his assessment for an offending behaviour programme, I listened as he described how he’d met, raped and strangled the woman, then dumped her body. The way he detailed what he’d done was shocking to hear. The calmness in his voice still haunts me. It was the first time it hit me that a murderer could look ‘normal’. He was good-looking, not scary, and I remember thinking if I’d met him outside of prison, during a night out, I’d have thought nothing of chatting to him. That had a lasting impact – the whole interview challenged my preconceived notions and the stereotypes I harboured. Afterwards, I thought it was probably a good way of introducing me to working with offenders – being thrown right into it.

After attending training, and following some changes in the psychology department, my role became 'Offender Behaviour Programme Facilitator'. As part of this role I assessed prisoners for their eligibility and suitability to undertake particular programmes of rehabilitation, conducted initial interviews with them to find out their willingness to participate, then delivered the six-week programme (at the time it was TSP – The Thinking Skills Programme). I always read up about the prisoner I was due to work with and I knew what their crimes were prior to meeting them. This was not always helpful – it’s inevitable that you build a picture of what you think that man will be like and sometimes they are not as you imagined. One younger man had stabbed a 17-year-old (the age of one of my sons at the time) and, after reading his file, I was unsure whether I could see him. I did, and I ended up working very well with him. In person he was so different from what I'd anticipated. Learning about his background and upbringing enabled me to see past the crime. That worked both ways, though; occasionally an offender didn’t seem so bad on paper, but was intimidating in person.

Along with another facilitator, I delivered the set programme to groups of 11 prisoners at a time. We each had ‘key’ participants and these were the ones we worked more closely with to reduce their risks of reoffending. I worked in a one-to-one setting with these prisoners and they had at least four individual sessions each throughout the programme. During the sessions, they were encouraged to identify their personal risk factors and would discuss their crime and how they planned on managing the risks associated with their offending in the future. Prisoners often felt more comfortable disclosing specifics of their crime to their facilitator, rather than a whole group of people.

Hearing offenders talk about their crime could be challenging – in particular, those relating to sex offences. I found the one-to-one sessions intense and listening to details of offences often put my skills to the test. I really had to concentrate to shut out ‘seeing’ the offences in my head as they detailed them. I learned to detach myself somewhat from the victims of the crimes, as this was the only way for me to cope with some of the hideous things I was told. My role was to work well with the offender and build a rapport, so if I thought too much about what the victims went through, it made that even more challenging. I did find it difficult to shut off sometimes, and suffered from disturbing thoughts after I got home from work – particularly when trying to sleep. One offender was very open about how he’d had sexual activity with a child, going into detail about what he’d done and how he’d done it. This offence played on my mind a lot. Having children myself made me more sensitive to hearing him talk about his crime and as soon as I was away from work, I’d find myself crying. Working with sex offenders did have an impact on me; I was probably overprotective of my teenage daughter, as my fears of what might happen to her were always heightened.

After a particularly challenging time, both personally and professionally, I decided to leave the prison. Over the three years, the job had taken its toll on me, and I realised I’d begun to allow my personal feelings to get in the way of working effectively with the offenders. I found I was getting into arguments on occasion – for example with some of the more disruptive members of the group, who refused to take any responsibility for their behaviour.

Even now, four years after leaving the prison service, I’m still less trusting of people in general as a result of what I read about and heard. Looking back, there were many aspects of the job I enjoyed – it was rewarding at times, there was never a dull moment and I learned a lot about psychology and criminal behaviour. The team I worked with were amazing and we remain good friends. Even knowing how the job affected me, I wouldn’t change my decision to work there.

Sam Carrington’s novel, Bad Sister, is available now in paperback, digital and audio.

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